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Choosing Civility: The Twenty-five Rules of Considerate Conduct Blow Me Blow Me Half Broke Horses The Glass Castle Steve Jobs

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    « Why Did You Get A Divorce? | Main | Is A Threesome A Good Idea? »

    Gun Shy

    Dear Lennie, I am in immensely in love with a woman who builds walls around herself. She dumped me 3 months ago due to external commitments, but I still love her. I really think it was that I didn't make enough money, even though I make $.25M a year.  Little by little and by charm and caring we are now seeing each other. We went out on a date last week and had a really great time again. We are now emailing every day and talking every day. She ended a letter to me by saying "I love you". As a guy do I let this go and play cool, or do I tell her I love her all over again. I do love her but I want to keep a little distance before we go any further again. A little gun shy now!

    Dear Gun Shy, its never fun to open your heart and risk getting hurt. Especially a second time! Tell her that you love her, but that you also feel vulnerable and don't want to get hurt again. Take things slow. She will appreciate the honesty, and the vulnerability, and this way you are letting her know that you don't want any more games. Protect your heart, but allow yourself to feel. By the tone of your email you sound like a great guy. It is understandable that women often worry about money, but you do well for yourself. She needs to think about what is important to her. Hopefully she is not a "material girl" who cannot appreciate that there are more important things in life (namely the love and respect of a great man) than Louis Vuitton. 

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