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    « The next step | Main | Why is she unwilling to commit? »
    Sunday
    Jun262011

    Shape up!

    Dear Lennie, How can I get my girl to go to the gym without pissing her off and making her self-conscious?

    Women are very sensitive about their physical appearance. You want to make sure to approach this the right way so that she doesn’t feel unattractive around you (bye-bye sex life). A great thing to do is to say that you need her to help you get motivated. Such as “I want to sign up for this boot camp class but I don’t want to do it alone. Will you come with me (insert puppy-dog face)?” Another tactic is to tell her that you want to get outside more and invite her on a hike, taking the dog for a run, snorkeling, surfing or diving lessons, a weekend trip to a national park. If she complains that she’s depressed you might want to share research with her about how exercise is universally recommended by psychiatrists, and it’s a great first step to feeling better and boosting your endorphins. This way it isn’t about her body, but her well-being.

    Reader Comments (1)

    This is good advice from Lennie. I will say, though, if you want HER to be in better shape/look better even if you cloak it in a mental health or general health and recreation pitch, make SURE you are in good shape. I have been 5/8 119 or 120 all life I have put on about 7 or 8 pounds, accident, but even then not working out much the last year after lifetime of swimming, dancing, yoga, treadmill etc.. Gym rat and dancer all life. I was about 124 and then gained 6 on crutches.

    So he mentioned it and we NEVER fight, blissfully happy living together mostly (mostly: i have my own place and travel a lot). He's 35 or 30 lbs overweight and I never get mad but it SERIOUSLY pissed me off when he mentioned something about how he liked how I looked better before... I'm a solid in jeans now not a 2 and size 2 fancy slacks/tuxedo pants fit but don't hang..

    Just make sure if you do want her in the gym for aesthetic reasons, you don't have a big gut and sit on your ass eating ice cream after dinner every night! :)

    June 27, 2011 | Unregistered Commentervictoria ordin

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