Lennie, I'm a woman in my early 40s and I haven't had a date in two and a half years. I don't even know where to start. Help.
Dear Two and a Half: The older we get, the tougher it is to date for many reasons. We become more particular about what we are looking for, we have precious little free time to date, and we've had so many disappointments that we are easily discouraged and often skeptical from the onset. The most important thing is to stay positive, keep looking beautiful, and try to remain playful. Often when women get older, we know so definitively what we want that we forget that in order to get what we want we need to be coy. Particularly our generation, because we were told we could be "equal" and so we had to toughen up a bit so we could compete in a "man's world" so to speak...some men are threatened by that...so play more helpless even if you aren't. Men want to feel needed and useful. Online dating plays an important part in today's dating world, but much time is wasted communicating back and forth. If you are going to online date, try to set up a phone call and a date as quickly as possible. The best way to meet people is to get out in the world an stay off the web. Get out there and live your life and don't be afraid to approach men either.