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    « Why Can't She Just Be Honest? | Main | Mr. Manners?! »
    Sunday
    Sep252011

    Ultimatums

    Lennie

    How do you feel about women giving their man an ultimatum, like an engagement proposal deadline?

    I am all for women standing their ground and putting down their foot. I know one woman who after a year asked her man where it was going. He said "what do you mean? I thought we were having fun" she told him if he didn't know now, he never would, and dumped him. Three months later he showed up with a ring. Ten years later, they are still happily married. I don't think a man should waste a woman's time. If you need to kick his ass to the curb to get him to commit, then do it. Just be prepared that he may commit to a life without you. But, better to know now than three years from now.

    Reader Comments (5)

    A man playing with woman's time... not so fun... if a man is not serious to start with in a relationship he better stay alone and not bother the woman at all...unless it is a mutual understanding that there is nothing to expect and that it is quite clear...

    September 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKath

    I think she needs to put the deadline on herself - and if he hasnt moved in that direction by that time - she needs to move on down the road! I personally dont think it's a good idea to "force" someone to marry you! One foot in is not good!

    September 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAWM

    Reminds me of the old joke about a guy, long married, who spent many of his days on his fishing boat when finally the wife gave him the ultimatum, "It's either me or that boat!" We were having coffee some time later when he said, "You know, I sure do miss that woman."

    September 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDavid L

    I did it once, we broke up for 5 months and now are getting married 5 years later. It is better to be real with your feelings rather than waiting around for him to propose, a lot of guys think living together is marriage and that simply is not true.

    September 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

    I see how it can work out but I am fully against ultimatums. I think of them as a power play, therefore making them unfair. I agree with an earlier comment that you should give yourself a deadline and maybe speak frankly about whatever issue is going on -- but an ultimatum is not the way to go. If someone needs an ultimatum for marriage, they may need one for everything and I just don't have the energy to continuously make some make a choice. Make your own choices and either someone goes with you or they don't.....

    December 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommentereM - TheGrayAreaBlog

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