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« If You’re Happy And You Know It… | Main | 5 Physical Deal Breakers For Women »

Good Friends

I was walking through Whole Foods the other day noting how much the aisles look like a movie set where the products all have unrecognizable brands so as to avoid a lawsuit or give anyone any free publicity. And, I came across a rather creepy looking photo on a cereal box.

The cereal is called Good Friends. The photo is of a hispanic man and white woman in their sixties, smiling very uncomfortably while holding a giant bowl of high-fiber cereal that appears as large as their heads. Whether they are uncomfortable from consuming 50% of their daily fiber, from marketing a product targeted to seniors, or due to some unspoken interracial tension, I will never know. But it got me thinking about what else is wrong with this picture.

How often do you see a handsome older man with a woman of his age group? Never in Los Angeles, I tell you. On the rare occasion you do, the man is not smiling. He is not canoodling. He is not playing footsie. He is sitting across from his septuagenarian counterpart eating in silence and gawking at whatever hot, young woman crosses his line of vision. Not unlike one of the opening scenes in Crazy Stupid Love when Steve Carrell and Julianne Moore, as Cal and Emily, are having dinner.

Older married couples are often completely disinterested in one another, and yet, they are together. Sure there is some residual love component, but after years together, they have nothing in common. The children are grown and out of the house and are no longer the topic of conversation. The passion is gone. The mutual interests have waned. Those little quirks one used to find adorable in the other are now irritating. In the best circumstances, the man and woman are good friends. In the worst, they are detached, disinterested and might as well be alone. Is it complacency, money concerns, or a fear of dying alone that keeps these unhappy couples together? 

For older women, financial dependency is often a factor. The longer a woman is out of the work force, the more difficult it is for here to jump back in. And, if she spent 30 plus years raising a family and being a wife, what exactly are her qualifications? Does she know how to Tweet? Is she well-versed at web design and familiar with HTML coding? Does she even know how to use her phone for anything other than texting and calling? Odds are, her skills are horrendously out of date and need a facelift—her face might need one as well. She cannot compete in the work (or play) force; she is obsolete.

Growing old sucks for women. I recently overheard two 60+ women talking about going on match.com now that they were recently single. Their husbands had left them for younger women. Alone together, they strategized: maybe a little nip/tuck, a revamping of their wardrobes, and hiring a professional photographer. That ought to do it! Good luck! If an intelligent, sexy woman in her late thirties with a rocking body can't find a man, these women don't stand a chance. Perhaps that's why the awkward look of the woman on the cereal box. The best shot she has with her Ricardo Montalban faux husband is to be "good friends".  

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Reader Comments (27)

Okay Older Guy, clearly there is a difference in thoughts here between you and Lisa. Perhaps we can just leave it at that. I have my own opinions on your statements, but don't feel it necessary to fuel any fires one way or another. Glad the blog provoked some stimulating conversation!

September 19, 2011 | Registered CommenterLennie Ross

My apologies to the kind gentleman who posted several times. It was not my intention to offend him or ruffle any feathers. I just don't know what came over me, to speak my mind so thoughtlessly. But, on behalf of all women over 40, I rest my case. Thank you, Lennie, for a delightful look at this subject.

September 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLisa Whitlock

What Older Guy doesn't realize is the 21 yr old who buys her own lingerie to dress up for some self-absorbed Peter Pan prick who give her nothing but cock as a reward will some day realize she has no self-esteem and will resent that older guy for taking advantage of her and using her for sex. men like older guy don't like women older than 35, because they have self-esteem and won't be treated like shit. We are perfectly willing to dress up and role-play, but only if the man foots the bill on the lingerie and toys. Wantin your cake and eating it too is all too common with today's male. All take and no give. And don't say you're go if her an orgasm, because she's likely faking it! And we can give ourselves our own orgasms better most of the time. One day older guy will wake up and smell the coffee. Until then, he'll likely just be smelling his own spunk.

September 20, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterConfident Woman

I am a millionaire matchmakers. Men pay me $25,000 a year to find younger women to date, fall in love with, and/or marry. I have about 30 clients so I make a good living -- about $750,000 a year before expenses, about $600,000 a year after expenses. People are asking me, "Why are men willing to pay so much money to meet a younger woman, are the older ones that bad?" I tell them they are. But going forward, I will just refer them to this thread.

Ladies, thank you for being so bitter! Keep it up! My future income depends on you. I am forever grateful.

September 20, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMillionaire Matchmaker

Millionaire Matchmaker, talk about bitter. You are downright hostile towards women. Sounds like a typical Los Angeles attitude. I wish you luck in business. I hope your integrity is better thank your attitude. From what I hear "matchmaking services" tend to be glorified escort agencies and integrity is something they often lack.

September 20, 2011 | Registered CommenterLennie Ross

Millionaire Matchmaker... are you Patti Stanger? If you are, I used your service, and all I can say is I'd rather have bought a new Porsche. I can find hookers and gold-diggers without your help. I read every comment, and first I must say that Older Guy is a douche. I know many delightful women in their 30s, 40s and 50s who are sexy, open, and playful and have far more to offer than some 21 year old twit. Older Guy can have the 21 year olds... and the bitter 50+ yr old matchmakers. Here's to all the sexy vixens, cougars and cougarettes who embrace their womanhood and their self-esteem and are just waiting for a decent guy (me) to treat them with respect. Oh, and Millionaire Matchmaker, it's not all about the money you earn... there is something to be said for being able to sleep at night and for respecting yourself for the work you do (or don't do, as the case may be).

September 20, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBond, James Bond

Thank you Mr. Bond! I thought that Matchmaker was a little full of herself too! And, I agree with you, we are delightful, playful can articulate the English language. Well stated, Bond!!

September 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLisa Whitlock

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