Its Oscar season, and the nominees for best actor/actress in a social media performance are:
Kim Kardashian for faking her relationship with Kris Humphries to the point of buying herself her own engagement ring and pretending he bought it for her so she would not have to feel and look pathetic by still being single in her thirties.
Charlie Sheen for parlaying his personal rage into a show idea called “Anger Management” and acting sane enough to convince the FX network executives to give him a shot after he already berated and humiliated the network executives on Two and a Half Men.
Crystal Harris (25) for pretending she was in love with Hugh Hefner (85), who is old enough to be her grandfather, then having the common sense to call off the wedding five days before tying the knot.
Here’s the thing these pseudo-celebrities seem to have forgotten: what makes the audience loyal to an actor is the actor’s ability to do the same thing over and over again convincingly. How do they do this, you ask? By being true to themselves—Okay, Charlie, you are a real celebrity, but you’re also a pompous asshole, alcoholic, bipolar nut job, so excuse me if I don’t give you proper accreditation in my blog.
The reason we love Harrison Ford is because he consistently plays the reluctant hero in all his movies. Just look at Raiders of the Lost Ark, Six Days and Seven Nights, Patriot Games, Clear & Present Danger and The Fugitive to name a few. It is who he is and what he does best. We love Sandra Bullock for being the goofy girl next door with a tough façade and heart of gold. These are their personality traits, their essences, which is why we love seeing them in these roles. They’re good at it; they’re natural at it. Deep down inside, it’s who they are.
To deviate from oneself will result in alienating the audience. Let’s face it, when George Clooney does anything other than his smooth-talking Cary Grant performances, we cringe (The Descendants, for example). Georgie boy, don’t try to be emotional. We’re not buying it. Just be your dashing self, preferably in a tuxedo, and for God sake keep your shirt on! You’re too old for that nonsense—leave that to Ryan Gosling. Further to this point, nobody wants to see Julia Roberts acting sexy. She can’t even walk in high heels. Leave the sexy roles to someone who is truly sexy—Angelina Jolie—its what she does best and she embraces it in her performances.
The performances of Kim Kardashian, Charlie Sheen and Crystal Harris resulted in tremendous media hype and pursuant prosperity. In real life though, that’s not always the case. Women, in particular, often act chameleon-like to win a man over. We pretend we’re laid back, when we’re really uptight. We feign loving sports, when watching anything other than the Superbowl half-time show is like Chinese water torture for us. We mock enjoying beer, when we think it tastes like piss and can’t even stand kissing you when you have beer breath. Eventually, the truth comes out and the men in our lives learn that the real us isn’t anything like our online profile or our first date performance. This is not a good day!
In Hollywood and in real life, you can only live a lie for so long. Eventually it will catch up with you. The real you will shine through and if that real you is not more impressive than the fake you, you’re going to lose your audience…or your significant other. Next time you go on a date remember to be yourself, because that’s the easiest role to play. It’s the role that attracts a faithful audience. It’s the role that will win you your Oscar…or Steve, or whatever his name may be.