The other day at Pilates I overheard two women talking about a mutual friend who was more fortunate than they were. Let’s call her Sally, for argument sake. Everything they said about Sally was a criticism. "Most of the time she didn't mention it, but occasionally she slipped up,” one of them said in regard to her wealth. Really? Slipped up? Like it’s some kind of flaw for to speak of her fortunate life? Is there some unwritten rulebook that says Sally is supposed to hide her lifestyle or apologize for the money either she or her husband earned or inherited? Ladies, please grow up!
Apparently, Sally had mentioned taking her two young children and nanny to Laguna for the long weekend and was shocked at the expensive accommodations—$3000 a night for the four of them. Even though she was staying at The Montage Laguna Beach, a luxurious beachfront hotel, her comment was clearly one of astonishment not braggadocio. The girls went on to calculate that the number didn't include meals, activities, and of course spa. Sally was surely going to spend time at the spa. After all that's what wealthy women do!
One of these catty Pilates women said "she should be giving that money to someone who needs it not spending it on a hotel." I was shocked to hear this. It is her money to spend as she sees fit. Clearly the Pilates women were envious of Sally’s lifestyle. First, may I point out that wealthy people are the reason charity exists? I don't know many destitute people who are generous, but the wealthy people I know are constantly doling our dollars to charitable causes. The less fortunate have no right to expect charity from those who have more. If you want everything equal then live in a communist country. It is not the duty of the wealthy to be charitable, but simply their prerogative—just like it’s their choice to spend their money on hotels, cars, clothes and yachts.
These envious women who clearly suffer from low self-esteem condemned Sally for being who she is. If they can't handle having a friend who is more fortunate than they are, they have two choices: end the friendship or change their own lives. If you're not happy with the life you carved out for yourself then get off your ass, stop attacking people who seemingly have more than you, and do something about it. I have no sympathy for people who attack others in lieu of working on themselves. Anyone who thinks that someone shouldn't spend money frivolously on expensive shoes or hotel rooms is just bitter. If you have it, it's yours to do what you want with it. I know I would. And if you judge me for how I choose to live my life, then you aren't much of a friend.
Jealousy is an unattractive quality that will get you nowhere. It certainly won't get you to Laguna for the long weekend!