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Choosing Civility: The Twenty-five Rules of Considerate Conduct Blow Me Blow Me Half Broke Horses The Glass Castle Steve Jobs

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Welcome to my blog on dating in Los Angeles.  I hope you find my real life stories and anecdotes on being smart, sexy and single in the City of Angels as amusing (and tragic) as I do.  If you enjoy reading my posts, please share this blog site with your friends, family, loved ones, and less loved ones.  

Please check out my Sex and the City style novel Blow Me—available now in e-book and paperback on my website and lulu.com. Also available in ebook on amazon.com and Google books.



i•thumb noun \ī-ˈthəm\

Definition of iThumb:

1:  Inflammation caused by overuse of mobile devices such as iPhones, iPads, Blackberries and Droids causing soreness of thumbs and numbness in hands, often radiating to wrists, elbows, and shoulders which if left untreated may lead to Carpal Tunnel Syndrome and in extreme cases require surgery.

I recently wrote a guest post on Singletease called He Texts Me, He Texts Me Not on how texting is harmful to your dating life. Turns out, it’s also harmful to your health. You might have noticed lately that I’ve been doing more and more video blogging. This is partly to explore a new medium, but mainly to give my hands a rest from typing. It seems that all my texting, typing, Tweeting and Facebooking has caused me to have iThumb. Thank you, Steve Jobs. While I love your technology, I could do without the ergonomic design flaws of the iPad and iPhone. Maybe it's operator error. Ever notice how the iPhone and iPad advertisements never show anyone using their thumbs? This is likely at the advice of in-house legal liability counsel. Don’t get me wrong. I love my Apple gadgets and I love Steve Jobs. He’s an über-genius. I find that immensely sexy, which brings me back to the point of this blog.

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5 Common First Date Mistakes

First dates are full of expectation and angst.  Each party comes to the table with a wish list and a deal breaker list, and throughout the course of the date, both the man and the woman are going through their checklist as they size each other up. It’s good to be aware of some common first date mistakes so you don’t wind up on someone’s deal breaker list. In this video I discuss the following 5 common mistakes:

1. Talking Excessively About Yourself

2. Talking About Your Ex

3. Being Negative or Sarcastic

4. Lacking Basic Manners & Social Skills

5. Immediately Asking For A Second Date

I hope you enjoy my video and wish you the best in dating! 


Why I'm Not Married

It's June. Wedding season is officially here, having been kicked off in April by the royal wedding. Hugh Hefner is marrying his child bride on June 18th and Kim Kardashian just got weighted down with a 20.5 carat engagement ring worth a little over 2 million dollars. Love is in the air—or at least celebrity marriages are lofting about. Am I feeling left out? Not really.

I recently read an article in Marie-Claire called Did You Marry The Wrong Guy? Typical women’s magazine subject matter—but effective. It got me thinking about my life and why I’m not married. I know why I’m not married, but it’s a question often asked by the men I date. They are looking for something wrong with me. They are looking for a flaw. Once bitten, twice shy. Too good to be true. All that jazz. Why can’t they just recognize a good thing when they see it and say “wow, where have you been all my life?” and quickly put a ring on my finger, before some other man gets the same idea.

While I don’t try to pass myself off as internally flawless, the rating given to the most pure diamonds, I do consider myself to be VVS1—or very very slightly imperfect.

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The Right Way To Hit On Women At The Gym

A few weeks ago, I told you why hitting on women at the gym is not a great idea.  But, I know that if you see this amazing girl at the gym and you just have to approach here, you’re going to do what you’re going to do.  At least let me help you by sharing four tips on how to tactfully approach a woman at the gym. 

1.  The Slow Build: Even though you may have been eying her for weeks, she may not have noticed you. So take your time approaching her. Flirting with eye contact and the occasional hello with her will give you an indication as to whether she’s interested. You do not want to rush this process, because you’ll come off aggressive and she may instinctually put her guard up.

2.  Avoid The Sleaze, Please: Skip the cheesy lines like  “Do you come here often?” and never make comments on her body. No leering (especially while she’s stretching), no stalking, and only approach one girl at the gym at a time.

3.  Know When To Quit: If she is showing no interest or is intentionally avoiding you, you might want to take that as a sign that she’s not interested. Time to move on to the next hottest girl at the gym.

4.  When & How To Seal The Deal: When it feels right, when she's showing some interest, then is it time for you to make your move. But, it's important you ask her out the right way, something casual, a smoothie or coffee, sometime after a work out. Giving her advance notice is a good idea.

Check out the video for more details! 


Ooh, Baby Baby...Baby Baby  

Salt and Pepa’s here, and we’re in effect. Want you to push it baby. Push it good.  P-Push it real good—as long as it’s not a baby stroller, you’re pushing.

Sandra Bullock kicked Jesse's ass to the curb when she caught him cheating with not one but several side dishes, and proceeded with her plans to adopt baby Louis anyway. This was initially a commitment she was going to make with her then husband.  Celebrity women such as Sandra Bullock and Madonna have oodles of dough and can afford to adopt. They can afford a nanny (or two) along with their bodyguards, personal assistants, and countless other staff. Brad and Angie have a basketball team of nannies for their Brady Bunch of six. For the average single woman, such as myself, adopting a child is a luxury one can ill-afford. 

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3 Reasons Women Should Initiate Sex

I hear a lot of women in long term relationships talk about how infrequently they have sex with their man. Sometimes it’s just once a week, sometimes its only once or twice a month. And inevitably it’s the man that initiates sex. Okay, I know you’re tired, I know you’re working your butt off having a career, keeping the house together, and caring for children or pets or what have you. But, if you do not have sex with your man regularly, his mind is going to wander, and eventually his body might too. 

Here are three reasons a woman should initiate sex with her man: 

REASON #1: It will make you feel empowered and you won’t view sex as an obligation or chore. You will view it as something playful, sexy and fun. Especially, if you set the mood with candles, music and sexy lingerie. And you might just start looking forward to sex again! 

REASON #2: It will make your man feel sexy and wanted. If you make him feel special, he will perform better, he'll be in a better mood, and you'll get along better. He may even go out of his way to show you how much he appreciates you.

REASON #3:  The more you keep your man satisfied, the less likely he is to wander. He may still look at other women and think about them, but he’s a lot less likely to act on his thoughts if you keep him feeling desired. He won’t feel a need to go elsewhere to get his ego—or other things—stroked.

Check out my video to hear more of what I think on this subject, and remember: a happy man makes for a happy woman!