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Welcome to my blog on dating in Los Angeles.  I hope you find my real life stories and anecdotes on being smart, sexy and single in the City of Angels as amusing (and tragic) as I do.  If you enjoy reading my posts, please share this blog site with your friends, family, loved ones, and less loved ones.  

Please check out my Sex and the City style novel Blow Me—available now in e-book and paperback on my website and lulu.com. Also available in ebook on amazon.com and Google books.

Entries in Dating in Los Angeles (44)


Happiness Is Riding A Moped

Have you ever been to Europe or South America and ridden a scooter while on vacation? They’re fun, aren’t they? And, yet, you’re kind of embarrassed to admit to having ridden one and having enjoyed the experience. Welcome to the dating world!

When I set up a guy I know with a girlfriend of mine, I didn’t think about how the world would view a 60 year-old man with a smoking hot 35 year-old woman with long blond hair who wore skirts just below the water line. I was just doing what I do best, matching things up. You know square peg, square hole, round peg, round hole. Oops, did I say something vulgar?

When a date turned into a weekend tryst and a weekend tryst turned into a full-fledged love affair, I noticed how awkward they were in public together. They both thought others viewed them as the rich older guy with the young rent-a-date. While he is rich and she does love designer clothes, that was by no means the premise to their relationship. Nevertheless, they were going to restaurants where they didn’t know anyone, because each in their own way, thought the other was a moped—fun to ride, but you wouldn’t want your friends to see you riding one.

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3 Questions Women Ask Men

When a woman meets a man, she wants to determine whether or not he's relationship material. There are three questions she always asks: What do you do for a living? What kind of car do you drive? And, where do you live? Don't be offended guys. Sure, these questions all point towards financial status, but there are plenty of other reasons she's asking these questions.

Men like talking about themselves. It makes them feel relaxed and confident. These questions allow the man to talk and take the pressure off the woman doing all the talking, which can make her look like a “chatterbox.” She may not be sport savvy enough to talk about the Final Four or the NHL Playoffs, and she may want to avoid a heated political debate about the Middle East or the mid-term elections. And, she knows you don’t want to talk about shopping! Asking about your work, car, and home are ice-breaker subjects that are easy for you to talk about and also interesting to her.

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I See Stylish People

Women love fashion. We loves how styles come and go, we love fabrics, textures, and patterns, and we understand color. Men, on the other hand, couldn't care less. Men just think, “I like red. I like green,” and put it together without another thought. Red and pink. Red and green. Green and some other weird shade of green. What-ever! To them, it’s just clothing. It’s sole purpose to keep their private parts covered and perhaps to keep them warm. Come on, guys! There’s way more to it than that.

How does this have anything to do with a blog on dating in Los Angeles? Well, despite the abundance of metrosexual males in this fair city, plenty of men still don’t know how to dress themselves. I often find myself looking at the way a man is dressed and wondering if he's color blind. Many men use this excuse, when in fact only 8% of men suffer from color blindness. I just think their mothers never trained them to care about what works and what doesn’t when it comes to fashion. 

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3 Ways To Break A Dating Rut

The other day when I was thinking of what dating saga I would write about next, I realized I hadn’t been on a date in a while. In fact, I hadn’t even gone online to look for a date. I guess partly because I find it insane that I have to hunt for a guy online, instead of just having it happen naturally; and partly, I just didn’t have the time. I had fallen into the most common trap. I had fallen deep into a dating rut. A dating rut is when you don't date, you don't want to date, and you don't make any effort to date. Not adviseable if you're looking for a happily ever after!

It was about time I started practicing what I preach. If you are like me and you’re tired of surfing match.com and seeing the same old profiles of the same old guys who just don’t do it for you, then take my advice—and I will endeavor to do the same.

Here are three simple ways to stir up the dating pot and kickstart your dating life. 

1. Get a life: It’s the oldest advice in the book, because it’s good advice. Pursue activities that you enjoy. Go horseback riding in Griffith Park. Sign up for conversational Italian class at the Beverly Hills Lingual Institute. I’m not saying you’ll meet a man at your Bar Method class, but doing activities you enjoy will bolster your ego, your confidence, and most importantly, get you out of the house. If you are feeling desperate and dejected, you’re not going to attract anyone. Having a life will make you feel better about yourself and will make you much more interesting to talk to when you do have that hot date.

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Happy Ending?

I have a girlfriend who used to go to a certain 5-star hotel spa for a weekly massage. I met her a few times after, and she always had a certain bounce in her step and glow to her skin. So, I decided to get a massage at the same hotel. I had a great massage—a bit more expensive than I’d like to pay—but I wasn’t on cloud nine. What was the big deal?

“Did you request Ernesto,” she asked, with a purr. Ernesto? She never told me to request Ernesto. I was curious, so I pried her for more information. Could she possibly be alluding to...? Turns out my girlfriend was getting more than her back rubbed. OMG. “Why?” I asked. She had a boyfriend, albeit he was several years older than her. Why would she let some strange guy get her off on a massage table? “He’s got very skilled hands,” she joked. Enough! I didn’t want to hear it. I put my hands to my ears and started singing “la, la, la, la, la…” to drown out her tales of sexual promiscuity.

Ever since Samantha Jones of Sex and the City went on a mission to get a happy ending massage, the concept has been more intriguing to women—particularly those nearing Cougar age.

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I’ll Be Auditioning For The Role Of Wife  

Online dating is just like auditioning. The casting director sifts through a sea of electronically submitted photos, one strikes a chord of interest, and then—with any luck on the part of the actor—an audition is set. Just like online dating, it's rare the actor gets an audition, and even more rare that he gets the lands the gig.

I have dated and auditioned excessively. With both dating and auditioning, a decision is made the minute you walk in the room. All you can do is either confirm that decision or fight an uphill battle trying to prove otherwise which rarely results in success. The moment I meet a date, I know whether it’s going to be a good or bad experience. I’m rarely surprised. I can try to convince myself that something more is there, but I am eventually forced to see that my first impression was right.  

Speed dating seems to make a lot more sense than online dating, by cutting straight to the audition room and not getting weeded out in the photo and resume process. We are instinctive creatures. We have a fight or flight instinct. We sense weakness and strength in others and our attraction (or lack thereof) is immediate. You see someone on an elevator and you smile or you don’t smile. Believe it or not, in that split second you have made a decision about that person. You don’t take your time throughout the elevator ride to decide if you like the person, if they seem friendly to you, and then consciously decide whether you should smile. You just go with it.

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