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Welcome to my blog on dating in Los Angeles.  I hope you find my real life stories and anecdotes on being smart, sexy and single in the City of Angels as amusing (and tragic) as I do.  If you enjoy reading my posts, please share this blog site with your friends, family, loved ones, and less loved ones.  

Please check out my Sex and the City style novel Blow Me—available now in e-book and paperback on my website and lulu.com. Also available in ebook on amazon.com and Google books.

Entries in First Dates (13)


I’ve Got The Music In Me  

I dated this guy a while back. We had nothing in common. He was a Republican from Texas, in the oil business, and painfully boring—and, he was in AA. I cannot go a meal without drinking a glass of wine. Unless of course it’s a crappy meal—or a crappy wine. How boring was he? I’d rather have known him when he drank.

By the end of the date, he went for a little tongue down throat action and invited me back to his hotel. There would be no second date! Go directly to jail. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. 

About a week later, he sent me the modern day equivalent of a mix tape—a brand new iPod classic loaded with 40,000 songs. It had every single song from Santana, Dave Matthews, Bruce Springstein, The Beattles, Bob Dylan and a myriad of other artists I had never heard of before. Nice idea for a gift, even if for the most part, it wasn't my type of music.

What I didn’t realize was just how much space 40,000 songs would take up on my computer. I used one of those software programs—the kind that’s supposed to unlock songs and download them onto my iTunes program. I had done this once before (when some guy gave me an iPod Nano as a gift) and it worked brilliantly. This time, I was screwed. I now have 40,000 songs, most of which I don’t want, on my computer, and 98% of them are locked. So, I either go through every song one by one to see if it’s locked or not, or just delete everything from 1/12/11 and hope that in doing so I do not delete some of my own music.

Thanks a million, dude. I guess it’s my fault. I should have never accepted a gift from someone I had no intention of seeing again. At least I didn’t get a virus.


If you enjoy my blog, please order my Sex and the City style novel, Blow Me, available on my website and on Amazon.comBarnes & Noble.comand Google Books


Sexy Shoe Diaries - Part 8

Most of us associate red shoes with The Wizard of Oz, as well as the fairy tale by Hans Christian Andersen. But, did you know that in Japanese Buddhism red clothing symbolizes fertility and childbirth. During the Elizabethan period, red clothing symbolized power and importance. Interesting subtextual signals to send on a first date! 

One of my favorite casual shoes for when I want a little color and a lot of comfort, these casual red leather Pucci clog style slides are the perfect solution. I love to wear them with dark jeans and a red blouse.

On your next  a date, consider slipping into a pair of red shoes. In addition to sending a powerful messages, men find red shoes very sexy!


7 Great First Dates in Los Angeles

First dates can be boring and awkward. Two people who hardly know each other sit across the table from one another and play twenty questions. Sometimes a date can feel more like an interview for the CEO of a Fortune 500 company by an executive recruiting firm than a prelude to romance. If you’re bored with the traditional dinner date, it’s time to take dating out of the restaurant and into the outdoors. Doing something ‘out of the box’ on a date can take the focus off running through the compatibility checklist and put the focus back on having fun. Not to mention, if the conversation is dry or hits a silent patch, you’ve got other things to do. Here are a few ways to get the fires going in an unconventional way:

1. Paddle Board in The Pacific: In Marina Del Rey or Malibu, you can rent a couple of paddle boards and get out on the ocean. It’s affordable, fun and the negative ions will wipe out any first-date negative energy. In Marina Del Rey at Mother’s Beach, you can visit Poseiden Stand Up. Rates start at $40 for 2 hours and classes are available at $120 for an hour and a half. Or, drive 15 minutes up the coast to Malibu Surf Shack where boards are $45 for 2 hours; wetsuits an extra $10. For the really adventuresome, take surfing lessons together. Either way, you’ll have a whale of a good time, forget all about being on a date and really learn what the other person is made of when they fall off their board and into the brisk Pacific Ocean. Do they laugh or complain? Do they get up and try again or do they quit? You’d be surprised what you can learn about someone when they’re out of their comfort zone. After paddling around the bay, have a drink and appetizers on the patio of The Malibu Beach Inn and enjoy the sunset. If your date goes really well, you can always get a room!

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WTF is with DTF?

I love the show Californication. It epitomizes the male perspective on dating in Los Angeles, which can be summed up with not one word, but three letters: DTF

Incase you’re not amongst the hip Showtime viewer demographic, the acronym DTF means down to fuck and is tossed about all too casually by Californication’s Hank Moody and his chunky, bald sidekick/agent, Charlie Runkle, whose only true objectives in life are: a) to make money and b) to get their rocks off—not that there’s anything wrong with either of those objectives, but I think the point of David Duchovny’s character is that he’s supposed to be a pathetic caricature of the Los Angeles male, not an idol. 

There is something wrong with society when a man’s primary concern is whether a woman is DTF.  She’s totally DTF. Is she DTF? Those two girls—DTF? 

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5 Common First Date Mistakes

First dates are full of expectation and angst.  Each party comes to the table with a wish list and a deal breaker list, and throughout the course of the date, both the man and the woman are going through their checklist as they size each other up. It’s good to be aware of some common first date mistakes so you don’t wind up on someone’s deal breaker list. In this video I discuss the following 5 common mistakes:

1. Talking Excessively About Yourself

2. Talking About Your Ex

3. Being Negative or Sarcastic

4. Lacking Basic Manners & Social Skills

5. Immediately Asking For A Second Date

I hope you enjoy my video and wish you the best in dating! 


The Right Way To Hit On Women At The Gym

A few weeks ago, I told you why hitting on women at the gym is not a great idea.  But, I know that if you see this amazing girl at the gym and you just have to approach here, you’re going to do what you’re going to do.  At least let me help you by sharing four tips on how to tactfully approach a woman at the gym. 

1.  The Slow Build: Even though you may have been eying her for weeks, she may not have noticed you. So take your time approaching her. Flirting with eye contact and the occasional hello with her will give you an indication as to whether she’s interested. You do not want to rush this process, because you’ll come off aggressive and she may instinctually put her guard up.

2.  Avoid The Sleaze, Please: Skip the cheesy lines like  “Do you come here often?” and never make comments on her body. No leering (especially while she’s stretching), no stalking, and only approach one girl at the gym at a time.

3.  Know When To Quit: If she is showing no interest or is intentionally avoiding you, you might want to take that as a sign that she’s not interested. Time to move on to the next hottest girl at the gym.

4.  When & How To Seal The Deal: When it feels right, when she's showing some interest, then is it time for you to make your move. But, it's important you ask her out the right way, something casual, a smoothie or coffee, sometime after a work out. Giving her advance notice is a good idea.

Check out the video for more details!